Who are you?

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So many of us define who we are by what we do: “I’m my job title”; or by what we have:  “I’m a home owner,” or “I drive a convertible”; or by our relationships:  “I’m somebody’s wife, mother”, etc.  These are easier to state than who we are.  It is hard to define and talk about that part of us that makes us unique.  That’s more illusive.  Who are you?  What is that part that is uniquely you? Call it the soul or essence of you. Maybe it is something that we can’t put into words.  It is a part of us that we experience from time to time but do not necessarily have the language to speak about.

There is a part of me—deep inside that doesn’t change whether I’m rich or my bank account only has a balance above $50 on payday.  There is a part that is me whether I am healthy or my body is facing challenges of disease or disability.  There is a part of me that has value no matter what mistakes I have made. 

There is a part of me that craves acknowledgement and validation.  That says aren’t I okay just as I am?

When I work with clients in visualization sessions, I often ask them to imagine a wise all loving being that has a message for them.  Invariably the message they repeat to me are “you are okay” or “it will be okay”  “You are special.”  Not how to do their job better or that they need to do more.  You are okay–a fundamental message of self acceptance.

In most client sessions I add the following statements to the suggestions about the specific issue they are working on.  “You are worthy.  You are loveable just as you are.  You are capable and strong.”  These statements touch people deeply.  Many people are embarrassed at the emotion they bring up. 

We are starving for acknowledgement of that core loveable part.  We are struggling for acknowledgement of our core net worth.  Just for today—whether you believe it or not—tell yourself you are okay just as you are.  Tell the “you” deep inside you are willing to acknowledge that it is there. Tell someone else that you see the part of them deep inside that is worthy, loveable and capable.  (This may be easier for you, as it is often easier to give to others than ourselves.)  Spread the love! 

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