Pondering my Catholic Upbringing

Posted on Posted in Self-Worth

I grew up in a very Catholic household so I got very mixed messages about self-worth.  You are a child of God therefore you are loved.  You are a sinner and you are not worthy.  In the mass, there is a prayer that says "Lord I am not worthy to receive you, just say the word and my soul shall be healed."  It got kind of confusing.  Am I a lovable child of God or a sinner who is not worthy?  And then if God is everywhere isn’t God already within me so haven’t I already received God?  Am I not already a part of God?   

I attended 16 years of Catholic schooling first grade through college and I was always at conflict with this mixed message.  As I’ve grown, I’ve resolved it by saying the messages are about the dualistic nature of being a spirit having a human experience.  The spirit that is part of the oneness of God is there as is the human part that learns its lessons through mistakes and falling short.  The human part doesn’t make us unworthy.  It makes us human.

I tend to set very high standards for myself and when I fall short–when I am human–I grab a big stick of negative self-talk to beat myself up with.  It is like that prayer in mass, I’m not worthy.  Except I always forget the second part–please say the word and my soul shall be healed.  I made the connection today that it is not just God that needs to say the word and heal our souls.  We need to say the words to ourselves that heal rather than hurt.  Say the words to yourself, say the words in prayer or meditation, say the words as an affirmation and you shall be healed.

Today I can stand with that tradition that I was raised in and what I’ve learned in my studies as a hypnotherapist and coach and say that the two are completely aligned and not so dualistic after all.

2 thoughts on “Pondering my Catholic Upbringing

  1. Great post for a Sunday! You’re right: at first the two messages seem to contradict each other, but ultimately they don’t. As humans, we’re not worthy of God’s love, but he gives it to us anyway.
    It was great meeting you yesterday! I’m adding your blog to my Blogarithm email.

  2. Interesting, I don’t believe we are unworthy. I believe we only think that we are and that is the mistake.

    The mision for me is to find the loveable parts of myself and others around me everyday.

    Yes we do things that are not of the highest good and there are many times we fall short but I don’t believe that makes us any less loveable. In fact, I believe as we acknowledge our humanness and vulnerabilities we become more loveable not less. Don’t know if that makes sense or not.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Sign up for our newsletter!