I had a potential client ask me, "what percentage of your practice is related to core issues like self-esteem as opposed to losing weight or stopping smoking?" My reply to her was that everything I do as hypnotherapist is about self-esteem.
When we have a habit that we just can’t find the way to get past, it affects our self-esteem. We feel silly and weak because a habit controls us. Often our habits are formed as coping mechanisms or ways to handle stress or comfort ourselves. When we learn less destructive ways to cope and conquer that habit our sense of accomplishment goes up.
In addition, sometimes we can’t tackle issues at all until we feel we a certain sense of core competency (core net worth). For example, many people come to me to get over test anxiety or fears of public speaking. I find if I only address it from the "you can speak without anxiety" stand point, I miss a lot.
Many years ago, I had a client I’ll call Jane. Jane had to give a major presentation for her company in front of all sorts of important dignitaries. She was terrified! I did the first session walking her through being able to release the anxiety and something just didn’t feel right. I called her after the session and checked in with her and she said it didn’t work. We started probing deeper and realized that she was sabotaging herself because here it was 1 week before the presentation and she didn’t know the material and her Powerpoint presentation was ugly and not helpful to the audience. We spent another session prepping for the speech from a coaching stand point–breaking down the material and helping her learn it. Jane still didn’t feel ready. Then we untapped something far deeper–she didn’t think she deserved to be in the position she was in. She felt like she was an impostor and didn’t belong on the dais of speakers for that event. Once we were able to break through to that baseline belief and work on that, she felt much better about doing the presentation. Obviously we couldn’t do all her self esteem work in the few sessions before the speech but even addressing the impostor syndrome in one session helped her do what she needed to do for her job.
People ask all the time why I choice the name Core Net Worth for this blog. They think I’m a financial planner. But the reason is simple. Beyond money or fame, or those who tell us they love us, we all need to believe that at our core we are worth something. Jack Canfield says that self-esteem means we feel we are lovable and capable. Having that certainty deep inside is what everyone needs. Imagine a world where each person knows at a deep level they are lovable and capable. Wouldn’t that be a nice place? I think so.
So when you see beyond hypnosis and coaching and all the topics I work on with clients–I can easily say–I do self-esteem work.
PS When I write about clients, I change their name and circumstances to protect their privacy.