© Joycemarrero | Dreamstime.com

I was talking with my dear friend the other day, Susan Kay Wyatt (@raisethequeen on Twitter).  She has this fabulous life—great husband, great daughter, she’s über-talented and so darn pretty, funny and smart—one of those women who you just love unless you are insecure and catty!  You have to check out her music at Susan Kay Wyatt music on Facebook or CD Baby. It is so uplifting and fun.  It’s all about the love darling!  If you haven’t heard of her yet, you soon will.  My friend is going places.

So SK and I are talking about all the projects she has on her plate and she is talking about the challenge of trying to keep everything going and still be the great mom and wife she wants to be (and is by the way!). Anyone out there relate to SK’s challenge?

I had stayed up till 4 in the morning the night before working on my book and was talking about all the things that I needed to get done too.  She said to me, “I look at my single friends like you and I think, ‘Wow I used to be able to stay up late at night working on my projects before I had my daughter but now I have to be up to get her to school.’  It was easier to get things done when it was just me or just me and my husband.” You’d have to know how great a mom SK is to know that she wasn’t at all wishing her daughter away.  In fact, the real question for her was, “Could she push forward with her career in the way she wanted and be the mother and wife she wanted to be?”  Comparing herself to me—no husband, no kids, only a great dog—doesn’t help her much does it?

And believe me as a single person, I catch myself in that trap.  I look at all the things SK has going in her life—really physically fit, great husband who supports her, amazing daughter, musical talent and I say yeah I can stay up late working on my book but I don’t have the support or life she’s got either.  I’ve taken the road less traveled and have the freedom to stay up late but sometimes feel like I’m really out on the limb by myself—with no back up.

We laugh because we know we’ve fallen into one of those bad habits that will stop your progress faster than anything–COMPARISON.

Seriously, how helpful is it when we look across the fence and focus on how great or how much easier someone else’s life looks? I remember years ago, Oprah talking with Dr. Phil and saying, “I wish I were one of those people who didn’t have to work so hard to maintain my weight.  There are other people who can eat what they want and barely exercise.”  Dr. Phil looked at her and said in the way that only Dr. Phil could say, “Get over it.  You aren’t one of those people!”

Our friends can inspire us but when we think, “I can’t do what I want to do with my life because I don’t have what they have”, that comparison is dis-empowering.  It doesn’t help us to pull up our big girl panties and do what has to be done. I see this so often when I’m working with clients.  Rather than focus on what shifts they can make with their lives right now, they look at others like Oprah was doing and say, “Other people have it easier than I do.”

We don’t know what is really going on completely in someone else’s lives. Maybe they do have it easier.  Maybe there’s a whole world of drama going on in their lives that we don’t see.  Maybe their lives actually suck!  Regardless, it doesn’t help us to think others have it easier than we do.  As Dr. Phil told Oprah so many years ago, “You aren’t those people!”  We have to focus on what we can do to make the shifts we want to make in our lives.

The great thing about SK and my friendship is we call each other on our stuff.  So we both had to refocus and ask, “What are the best things for me to do next to move my dreams forward,” and we set up a mastermind date to support each other to do just that.  That’s girl/woman power–collaboration and support, not comparison and competition.

Comparisons are dream killers.  And neither one of us is giving up on our dreams!

Where do you lose your own power by comparing your life to others?  Do you need to take a note from Dr. Phil, and remember, “You aren’t one of those people,” stop comparing yourself and do what is front of you to do right now?

©2012 Carol Woodliff

There are days I wish I had a better camera with me on our walks.  My Blackberry takes amazing photographs but there are some things it just can’t capture as well as the eye can see, like this crow sitting on the post of the electric wires.  This guy/gal was talking up a storm to us as Sadie and I walked by yesterday.

I’ve been have lots of crow encounters lately.  On our walks crows will swoop in front of us, or fly with us tree to tree as progress down the sidewalk.  I hear their calls to each other and I feel like I’m supposed to understand what they are saying to me.

A couple of weeks ago, I hosted a community fire ceremony at my house.  My neighbor told me recently that the night of that ceremony, she and her husband were headed out to dinner and as they drove by my front yard there were at least 25 to 30 crows gathered on the lawn. They jokingly commented to themselves that the crows were there for my ceremony. I got the truth bumps—those goose bumps I get when something strikes me as true.  Sounded silly to the Western mind, but to my shaman heart it seemed “spot on.”

I have sensed a sacred communication from the crows, but hadn’t been able to discern their messages.  I would say, “When I get home I need to meditate on what the crow was telling me.”  Day after day, I would return home and get involved in my day and not take time to listen for the crow’s wisdom.  Yesterday, I decided to sit down and actually connect with the spirit of those crows who seemed so insistent on talking to me.  The message was simple it said:

“Dive deeper into the sacred. Trust the unfolding of your path and don’t wait or hesitate. Excavate all within that you label a wound, and love it to the light.  Do this for yourself.  Help others to do it.  You are on the right path.  Miracles are unfolding.”

Was my message really,  “We approve! Keep going?”  My former paralegal self wasn’t satisfied with that answer so I went to the Internet to do some research on traditional interpretations of crows as animal totems and here is what I found:

“Crow knows the unknowable mysteries of creation and is the keeper of all sacred law. . . . It is the power of the unknown at work, and something special is about to happen.  Crow is also the guardian of ceremonial magic and healing. In any healing circle, Crow is present. Crow guides the magic of healing and the change in consciousness that will bring about a new reality and dispel “dis-ease” or illness. You can rest assure when ever crows are around, magic is nearby and you are about to experience a change in consciousness. Crow can give you the courage to enter the darkness of the void, which is the home of all that is not yet in form.”  (http://www.birdclan.org/crow.html)

AND

“Crows are the keepers of the Sacred Law. . . .Crow is a omen of Change. Crow lives in the void and has no sense of time, therefore, it sees past, present and future simultaneously. Crow merges both light and dark, both inner and outer.  It is the totem of the Great Spirit and must be respected as such.  They are symbols of creation and spiritual strength.  Look for opportunities to create and manifest the magic of life.  Crows are messengers calling to us about the creation and magic that is alive in the world today and available to us.”  (http://www.linsdomain.com/totems/pages/crow.htm)

Today on our walk, I didn’t see one crow!  I guess they thought I got the message.

What do you think? Have you ever seen an animal theme in your life?  Have you taken time to sense the message that animal was bringing to you?  Do you think I’m totally “for the birds”?  All respectful discussion is welcome.

© Mimnr1 | Dreamstime.com

Yesterday I was listening to Robert Allen’s webinar, “Building Your Billion Dollar Information Empire.”  I’m getting ready to launch my book, From Scared to Sacred, Lessons in Learning to Dance with Life. I thought I could pick up some tips that could be helpful.  If you aren’t familiar with Robert Allen, he is one of the gurus of information marketing.  As I listened to him, I heard him say, “You don’t want to write your book about you—that isn’t what people need or want to read.”  (Those may not be the exact words but that was the essence of what I heard.)

Ouch!  That just stuck a knife in the low grade insecurities I had when I started this book four years ago.  “Why would people want to hear my story?  I’m not special.  I don’t want to put myself out there in this vulnerable, naked way.” The book is my story of learning to listen and apply my internal spiritual guidance lessons to my life. It is an honest reflection of the dance of the human and the spirit in life told mostly in first person.  And if I do say so myself, it is a beautiful book!

I have people who keep asking me, “When is your book coming out?” because they want to read my book.  People who have read it, tell me that I’m going to change lots of lives with it  and still there must be some low grade fear simmering there that the statement scored a direct hit.  My ego wants to tell me that no one wants to read the book and is using a statement by an “expert” to prove that it is right. Instead of the inflated, “I’m better than everyone” ego, mine is the ultimate saboteur.

Fortunately I had a client calling me an hour after the webinar ended so I had to get centered so I could be of service to him.  I did my normal pre-client meditation and slipped into that stream of connection that brings me the messages from Spirit and almost immediately I knew that what I heard on the webinar was simply reflecting back to my own fears.

My purpose is to inspire people to tune in and listen to the expert inside; to use my stories both in writing and performance to help us laugh and cry together about this beautiful journey of experience life as a human; to help people heal the wounds of their past that keep them from connecting with their own beautiful spirit power; to help others remember how amazing the world is through my photography; to fully live in this dance between the spirit self and the human self without judging the human part for its doubts and fears; and to be very kind to myself as learn again and again that no one else’s path or purpose is exactly like mine.

Do you see the words “Billion Dollar Information Empire,” anywhere in that purpose statement?  I don’t.  I may, through fully living my purpose, make millions of dollars.  But when I make the money the focus, I feel off purpose. I find when I’m doing things on purpose, the money flows and when I try to be like others, the flow stops.  I have been so supported by the universe in the last four years as I wrote this book.  Everything I have needed has shown up as I needed it.  Why would I decide to doubt that kind of support?  Because that is what we humans do. Bless our fearful hearts!

I worked through my own doubts and fears and came back to center, knowing that there is someone out that that my book is written in the exact way needed for that person to connect with his or her own higher self.  In fact, there are many of those people out there.

I went to bed last night feeling as though I had had quite a spiritual work out.   I woke up this morning energized and ready to move forward guided by my spirit connection not, an outside expert.  No surprise that in my email this morning was a lovely email form Christine Kloser, who is an expert at helping transformational authors, entitled “The Power of Your Story” had to smile at that one!  Yes indeed, there is power in our stories.  And people do want to read them. Funny how the universe reflected that back to me, isn’t it?  I love how this all works.

I moved back to being excited about being able to share my journey with you.  I’m thankful for yet another reminder that when fear comes up, it isn’t something to judge, it is something to love yourself through.  It can be quite a spiritual workout to see what is happening and shift our energy but it is so worth it.

Have you ever had an experience like this?  Do you look for experts to avoid following what you already know inside?  Please share your comments or your own story.

PS.  Thanks to Robert Allen and Christine Kloser for being players in the drama in my head, standing in to reflect back to me exactly what was going on in my subconscious mind.

When I joined Pinterest, I decided it was a great place to start collecting art that I could show a cover designer when it came time to design my book cover. I gathered art that captured the essence of who I am and what I wanted my cover to look like.  (You can check out that Pinterest board here.)

One particular painting called to me. I don’t remember exactly how I stumbled upon the painting to pin it other than I am certain that spirit was guiding me. That painting is called Dancing Tree Spirits by an artist named AnnieB and is to the right below.

Those of you who have been following me on Facebook and on my blog probably know that trees speak to me.  I kept coming back to the painting by Annie, knowing it wasn’t exactly right for the book but it was close.  I remembered my friend Michelle telling me how she saw a painting in a gallery but that it had already been sold and the artist offered to do a similar painting for her on commission.  Several days went by and I thought, “It doesn’t hurt to ask!”

I followed the links back to her website and found that Annie lived in the UK and I drafted an email to her.  I wasn’t sure if I could afford her work or if she’d be interested but I took a deep breath and simply asked if she would be willing to create the art for my cover.  She responded back a day later that yes she’d be interested and quoted me a price that was more than fair.  She said she had recently had a reading that said she’d be working with a shaman.  She didn’t know any shamans.  How amazing that a couple of days later I send her the email where my signature says, “Shaman, Healer, Author.”

When we talked on Skype, it was as though we had been friends for years.   I told her of the underlying theme of my book is that in our time on earth our human self and our spirit self are here to dance and create together.  I told her of my love for trees.  I told her how my spirit wanted to be fully grounded and connected to the experience here on earth.  I am embracing my human journey and I want to encourage others to do the same.  And then I took another leap of faith and let her create for me and channel what spirit gave her about my book project and me into the art.

The art you see on my book cover is what Annie created for me on the first try.  It made me cry good tears and gave me chills when I saw it for the first time and I’m still pinching myself about how perfect it is.  Annie also did the awesome layout for the cover.

Over the last month Annie has taken such good care of me–the first time author who didn’t know exactly what she was asking for.  I’m so blessed! And so glad I listened to the impulse to ask her if she would do the cover!  What a divine partnership it has been!

Here’s Annie’s website if you’d like to check out her amazing art.

And to that Spirit Source that coordinated our connection–Thank you!  Thank you!  Thank you!

©2012 Carol Woodliff

On our walk today I saw this amazing flower. If you look around there are many other buds. In a few days, this little patch of land will probably be full of these flowers. But today, this one flower was ready to bloom and it did so. It didn’t wait for the other flowers to bloom.

How many of us have impulses to bloom but we stop ourselves not wanting to go first? We worry about leaving our friends or family behind if we step into our greatness. Or perhaps we are uncomfortable being a leader. We don’t want to be the one who sticks her head up and becomes a target.

Another area where we are often reluctant to go first is with forgiveness or connecting to our love energy. A perfect example of this is when we say something like, “When he/she does x, I will then do y,” or “Why do I have to be the bigger person?”

The thing is, the only person you can control is yourself. Waiting for someone else to shift is your ego talking, not your spirit or soul. You can’t make your life circumstance dependent on whether others are ready to bloom or not.  If you are having the impulse to be more loving to step out and live your life in a bigger way, it is up to you to do it now. Take note of this flower, it didn’t wait for all the other flowers to be ready in order to bloom. If you are hearing your calling, go ahead–you go first!  You might just be the first but soon you won’t be alone.  Your blooming will remind others that it is time for them too!

©2012 Carol Woodliff

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©2012 Carol Woodliff

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©2012 Carol Woodliff

©2012 Carol Woodliff

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©2012 Carol Woodliff

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